We think people are going to be beautiful, that their beauty will surprise us one day, but the beautiful people have already been found, and they are all in the movies. Or we think they will be flawed, imperfectly flawed, and we will love their flaws and that will make them beautiful, but in movies the flaws are always lovely and easy, like this person cares too much, or this person always wears the same charming overcoat, or this person can't decide what she wants but how cute is it, the way she wrinkles her nose and considers her options. "I could live with that," we think. I could love that part of them, too.
Our flaws are not elegant. They are ugly and cruel. This person fucks around and lies about it and never feels guilty. And we are not beautiful, not truly. Maybe in that way where everyone is beautiful because everyone is unique, but we do not have chins that are sized right for our faces or small, dainty collarbones. We get food in our teeth. We bulge from the tops of our pants. Why does that never happen in movies? In the movies, people dip their noses in sexy dollops of foam. People do not get whole leaves of arugula between their front teeth. In real life, it is always the arugula.
I do not mean to say that movies make it seem easy. They don't. In the movies they fight and scream, but always in full sentences. It comes out right. Or they toss things, like drinks - has anyone ever actually tossed a drink on someone? In real life? And they sit there, dripping, mouth agape, and they throw down their napkins and race for the door, and the misunderstanding comes to a head in the middle of the street where it rains and rains and will rain until they make up again, see each other clearly, drenched and beautiful, so beautiful, wet like they mean it. In the movies, it is always worth it. It is so rarely worth it in real life.
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