random act of bravery

I wrote this.

The writing isn't the brave part - although shouldn't it be? I suppose I've never thought of the act of writing (my writing) as an act of bravery. More as an act of self-indulgence. There can be courage in it. I read this Mac McClelland essay this week. I only discovered it through the scrim of backlash she's received. I'll admit to being shocked, and I've been trying to examine my reactions - what was it that put me off? The boldness of exposure - maybe. God knows I'm not brave enough to write something like that. I've been toying with the idea of submitting an essay to Nerve, words that have been simmering in the wake of the couple of weeks I spent with the Buddhist prior to leaving DC, and a subsequent conversation with Emily about the body, and its appreciation, and how we (women?) form our physical impressions - how we manage and experience our understandings of our bodies, and whether or not sex (or men, or a partner in general) is essential to that process. And I'm all, "But ohhhh, what if someone were to SEE it?" I've spent more time thinking about pseudonyms than I have actually writing the thing. And the essay itself would inevitably be fairly benign, nowhere near the level of soul-baring that McClelland, an established journalist with a career that depends on public perception of her ability to tackle loaded sociopolitical issues, demonstrates in this piece. Maybe I do take serious issue with her equating her desire for violent sex to the experiences of women who have no control, no protection, no recourse. But who am I to judge? I'm writing this from my sublet in Park Slope, not from Haiti.

And so what I mean to say: writing can be brave. I'm not sure mine is yet. But I am working on sharing it more, and that, for me, requires more courage than I display in an average year, and so. Go read it, if you'd like. You'll join the ranks of every person my mom and dad have worked with in the last 30 years. I'm trying to convince my parents that 27 is a good cut-off age for parental bragging, but they have yet to adopt this view.